Valentine's Day
Roses, are red, violets are blue, lockdown Valentine’s Day 2021 stinks for me and for you.
Valentine’s Day is often a bit of a mixed bag. We love it if a new crush emerges or we use it to celebrate our relationship. We hate it if we detest the commercialisation, don’t like being made to express love on a particular day in a particular way or, at that particular time, don’t have anyone to celebrate with. Valentine’s Day in the middle of a pandemic when we’ve all been locked in for months, is something else. For the 40% of the UK population who don’t live in a couple there haven’t been hurdles to overcome to find love and connection there have been enormous great walls. Valentine’s Day 2021 – all the pain and none of the fun. So what do to? Ignore and move on or salvage what we can?
As you might guess (otherwise what would there be to write about) how about trying to salvage what we can and mark the day to help get us all through this perpetual, never ending and ceaseless lockdown.
Reach Out – Right here right now we all need a bit of TLC. So let’s use this day to reach out to those we love (friends, family, romantic partners) and tell them they matter, they are important to us, that we have kept them in mind. Emotional closeness at a time of physical distancing sure isn’t easy but it’s worth a try. A friend sent me a tea bag at the start of last century’s lockdown to say ‘can’t wait until we can sit and have a cup of tea together’. It was thoughtful, kind, cost very little and made me feel loved. Presents don’t have to be expensive, the best ones are often the thoughtful and personal ones. Get creative.
Glam up – We all have ‘going out’ clothes that we can’t go out in. Those clothes are just hanging around our wardrobes Speaking personally I’ve worn nothing but leggings, sweatshirts, slippers and wellies since August. So how about we decide whatever our situation that we will glam up for this Valentine’s Day. There’s something about dressing up that makes the day a little bit less mundane. On Christmas Eve bereft of friends and wider family my family decided to (well I told them they had to) dress up black tie smart for Christmas Eve. To be strictly honest, my son, dressed exactly how he always dresses but did manage to put a tie around his neck, we let it go, it was a big effort for him. Did it bring our friends and family around, no it did not, was a meal with the same 5 people that have spent way more time together than any of us had ever planned? Yes it was, but it made the occasion a touch more fun. And I don’t know about you but small increments are about all I can manage right now.
Dance, dance, dance – As Louise Bomber reminded us all in a Connected Lives Seminar this week, moving and music are good for dialling down our stress systems and making us feel calmer and happier. So put on your favourite dance along, sing along tracks and dance like no one is watching.
This Valentine’s Day may not be anything like ideal but we can be intentional about choosing to add a little glamour and fun to this day in the middle of this seemingly never ending time.
Jenny Peters
12th February 2021