So Now You Homeschool:  Six Thoughts on Keeping Your Sanity

Jana, who homeschooled 4 children (yes 4, all at once and all the time) gives her top tips on homeschooling. 

It was 2004, and I was a young, American mum with four small children who had just moved to London for my husband’s work.  I was also a newly minted “homeschool mum,” learning to rework our prior traditional school routines into new rhythms of doing school in our little flat.  It was exhausting, scary, and a bit overwhelming at the beginning as I found my way. 

And now forward to 2020, and the world is rapidly changing around us.  Many of you are the newly minted homeschool parents, being asked to run school from your home in a bid to save the lives of many in your country.  We all want to do our part and we will, but how do we keep our sanity in this new reality?  Here are a few thoughts from an old homeschool mom who ended up finding a lot of joy and peace as we made our way through those early days.

1) Daily Assignment List

Create a list of each task your child needs to do for the day.  We kept ours all in one planner that had a home on the kitchen counter.  This saved me. Yes, it takes a little bit of time but was so worth it.  There are many things that your kids do in their schooling every day that they can do on their own and you need them to do this!  Having a list that they can refer to when you are busy helping someone else or trying to get your own work done is invaluable.  Hopefully, something like this will be provided by your school, but if not, make your own.  Give them the responsibility to keep busy with independent items.  If your child is too young to read, set out the things they can do on their own for them in one place.  If one of my children decided to get up early and start schoolwork before I had my cup of coffee?  Fantastic, but do not ask me hard questions at that time of the morning.  REFERENCE THE LIST.  See?  The uses are many.

2) Be Scheduled

Most kids thrive with some structure around their day and doing school at home is no different.  Find a routine that works with your situation.  For our family, we liked to start our school early and work hard to get it done.  This gave us free time in the afternoons for other pursuits.  Do you have all teenagers that want to start a little later?  That’s great, just set the expectations for what happens every day and what must be completed.  It drains the life out of me (and reduces sanity) to discuss what needs to be done every single day.  Save the hard discussions for things that aren’t routine.

3) Be Flexible

Wait, you just said be scheduled.  I know, but hear me out.  Once you have routines established, be willing to be flexible when opportunities arise.  Our ability to connect with others and even the outdoors is reduced dramatically in our current situation.  So, if the kids get an opportunity to FaceTime with grandparents, just do it.  Will it rain later but you could change your schedule to be outside for thirty minutes now, and finish the math after?  Use the flexibility that this time away from a traditional school affords you.  Get some sunshine and much needed Vitamin D.

4) Lean on Your People

Meeting up after school at the playground or park isn’t something that is possible for now.  In this crazy time of isolation, find ways to connect with those people that you do life with.  Use technology to keep connected with other adults and help each other.  Share your frustrations and your victories! The friendships of a few key people really provided me with the support I needed during those early years.

5) Foster Graciousness

Guess what?  You probably already know this if you have been homeschooling more than one whole day, but you aren’t always going to keep your sanity.  Frustrations and anger can sometimes boil over.  It’s ok.  Be willing to say that you are sorry and start again.  I’ve found that my kids were really gracious to me in my lapses of sanity, and I made it a goal early on to promote graciousness in our home.  Forgive each other and move forward.

6) Relax

Working a full-time job while trying to be the new homeschool parent?  Finding it hard to work new routines?  Worrying that your child will fall behind?  It’s going to be alright.  These uncertain days must make our children feel worried too.  In the end, my goal has always been to teach my children how to think and how to learn.  With those skills, they will be able to tackle the problems that life brings their way and they will learn things they need when they need them.  A few months off of their regular routine and learning is not going to cause them a huge setback for their future goals.  Trust that this time is growing them, as it is also growing us.

 Looking back, I’m so grateful for the years we spent in our flat doing life together.  Some days were amazing, and others were challenging to say the least.  But we grew from it and became better people because of it.   We learned how to give and receive grace.  It’s been a lot of years now since my London days.  My oldest three are grown up, and the baby I carried in a sling through every museum, park and playground I could find just turned sixteen.  But my love for London and the wonderful people who live in it remains strong.  My thoughts and prayers are sent your way as we all fight for safety in our cities.  May there be grace in your homes as you move through the next few months.